Educating adolescent and parental love

Depends on my skirt and my father's wallet! Individual farmer in the family. Parenting a teenager and destroying overprotection loving parents. How to raise a teenager young man

One child in the family. The most beloved, the most expensive. All for rodnulki, everything if only son smiling and happy.

But son grew up, and excessive tutelage becomes smaller. For loving parents th   it is still the same small and inexperienced boy, whom where you need to decide where the razrulit ...

But he has long been its adult life, a girl and a desire to live in freedom. So, as you want it, not the parents.

Like and family life, and what draws the certainty is not far off, but the parents put a spoke in the wheel, and pull down the harm that was created over the years. Trying to break, his re sonny. Snap back to the skirt and return to the house of a favorite child.

And how to be in this situation?

Of course, loving parents do it all of the best intentions.

Try to protect the child up to the last and do not want to let him into the harsh world of independence.

How to solve the problem of excessive care?

As lucidly explained by loving parents that the son grew up, and he has a personal life? The question is rather rhetorical. No definite answer to what it is not, and if not who did not reply to.

Can collect will in a fist, and take the first step in the direction? In an extreme case, parents will always return. Try to solve all the problems, to live, not survive, no one is dependent and stay on top. Do you want to live - learn to spin, as they say.

DIY their lives such as I would like you to live it. Let go of Mom's hand and my father's wallet. Start work, understand what it is to contain at least one yourself. Maybe then you'll understand why parents scold you for embezzlement and carelessness ...

Compromise and is always there! It is only necessary to choose the right way and start a new path. Yes, it will be difficult, it will be difficult to get used to the fact that the whole load will fall on your shoulders, but what to do, life is either afloat or go to the bottom.

Of course, do not argue, there is an intermediate state, neither fish nor fowl. But who will you be? This is not independence, to live separately on all the same money the parents, it is not a step forward, it is a pathetic attempt to prove to yourself that you can at least something, but you can not do ...

In your life, absolutely nothing has changed, you are still just in limbo and is completely dependent on his loving parents.

So where is the way out of the circle? To go, to take the risk and make the most of all. That is the right solution, which unfortunately, is not willing to accept one of the teens.

To educate teens vatakatov, consumers. We loved, cherished and received? Son, who can not even afford to pour tea yourself ...

Here it is destructive parental love and overprotection in the education of teenagers.

From the only child of hope and support in the future, an individual farmer grows, give him everything and not take anything in return. All owe him, and he does not have anyone. It is difficult to live in the future to such people, they are not adapted to life.

And if the parents anything happen? What then will become of them, I have long grown, but not independent child? He sag under this life, and left with nothing, without livelihoods and without any ideas and opportunities to find those funds.

Loving parents, think about whether to indulge their children, teenagers ...

Should I let them that children in large families do not see at all? After the words: Dad buy me a car, can become the last word.

Why do you yourself not to capitalize on what you want to buy? After all, if one desires, and will not ruin. Here it is a major fault in the education of teenagers, we allow all children, not thinking that in the future all this will not give them one.

We do not prepare them for life, we adapt and accustom them to the purse ... Think about who in old age you will support. Those who head wind and shit? No, he will forget about you once you will not be able to give him what he needs.

Unfortunately, that's often the case.

Loving parents, teach your children to be independent and pay attention to the education of young people.

Note to parents: Teens and you

Wisdom and prudence of parents, it is necessary to establish a friendly and open relationship with children. It is not always easy, but you need to compromise in any way. How difficult situations and seemingly intractable problems is the way of the teenager.

In situations like this should work rules and restrictions imposed by their parents. There are some recommendations which are much easier to establish appropriate relations between parents and children.

A very important condition not to exercise despotic and categorical in respect of certain aspects of the child's behavior. To obey always and everywhere will not even kid, let alone a teenager. This period of age, is characterized by a keen sense of self-esteem. Therefore, any criticism of the actions, is a very large resistance, and sometimes aggressiveness. Any requirements, parents should put forward a clear and unequivocal manner.

A child must learn to conduct themselves according to their conscience and respect for others. And parents, in turn, should make it clear to the adolescent that they recognize some degree of his innocence. Let him feel that he was under constant parental supervision. For this example, be sure to set a specific time to return home from a party or a disco. These rules will help you to some extent, protect it, and secondly, to teach responsibility.

Of course, you can not fully dictate how your child to live, but to take direct part in his life simply must. The increased needs of adolescents independence should not be a cause of quarrels and scandals among you. In any situation, as it would seem, at first glance, you can always find a middle ground. Reasonable arguments and tactful tone, help you to hear each other and find a way out of the situation, acceptable to both sides.

General principles of parenting, in different families can differ dramatically. Therefore, it is not necessary at all to rely on the experience of other parents at the board or opinions on certain aspects, and it is worth asking. Such exchange of experience, to effectively influence the choice of methods of education of certain qualities of your child. It is no secret that there are times when parents are at a loss. Enlisted the help of friends may have had a similar problem, you will know how to behave.

Try to observe family traditions, teach a teenager to respect the traditions and experience of previous generations. Believe me, a very strong argument not to neglect the care of older, have proper influence on the younger generation. How much stronger foundations in the family, as they met the other members, and so the child will accept them. Adamantly demands that run older brothers and sisters, will not seem old-fashioned or backward.

The internal resistance of the norms and principles of conduct laid down by adults, in most cases, it occurs at a subconscious level. This is an inevitable process, inherent nature. But along with these teens have to control their anger and to be friendly and polite. Overcoming any conflict situation will contribute to the patience and tact to each other. Domestic duties - is an integral part of the development of each child, they help the formation of a sense of responsibility and adulthood.

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How to deal with hysterical child, prevention

Tantrums the child

The kid is not allowed, he fell on the floor and started screaming and banging their feet. The child tantrum ... Sound familiar?

No need to grab the strap or drinking valerian. Help him! Record for tantrums - children are 2, 3 and 4 years.

At this age, toddler understand that parents can be manipulated. This step - turning. If you behave properly close growing up, kid resort to hysterics and scandals increasingly rare.

How to deal with hysterical child: Do not neglect a situation: regular tantrums undermine child's psyche. Do not lose the emotional connection with the baby. Exhibit positive emotions as he well behaved, do not sharpen a situation when you do not listen.

Talk to the crumbs, the interests of its problems, and you will see how many impressions and experiences in his little world. The more you learn about it, the faster you choose any problems.

Thespian

• Behavior: just that - the child comfortable with a fit, begins to behave aggressively, fighting, shouting, crying. You will be surprised, but the kid like a little actor, arranges performance. Children much more observant and smarter than we think.

• Causes If mom and dad have not developed a unified strategy, this child will be use. The kid thinks like this: "My mother would not let - let's go to the Pope, he certainly allow. And even better - pumped his tantrum, then surely all get. "

• Our advice, what to do : Should make a list of permitted and prohibited items. Try to either one of the parents does not detract from the authority of another. No way, Mom should not allow the fact that the Pope has forbidden, and vice versa. Do not confuse a child!

If a child's tantrum has started, you should immediately switch the attention of the kid, "Come, let us take out of the fridge-button lint" or "Look what a cloud - like an elephant."

If the kid threw a tantrum in a public place - no need to put on a show with the assistance of "uncles, aunts and police." Little actor needs the audience, and when they do not, the play may stop by itself.

Take the child home, where are you with him quietly, without raising his voice, to discuss the situation, let him know that such deeds, he will not achieve anything.

Strike quietly

But it happens that a child's tantrum begins literally out of the blue.

The cause of hysteria - in a morbid condition of the child. Admonish the baby, where and what was wrong with him, and try to measure the temperature as soon as possible take him to the doctor for an examination.

• Behavior: pipsqueak constantly depressed, do not let my mother a single step, its little interest in toys, he has trouble sleeping, he cries at the slightest pretext.

• The reasons for hysteria, fear and feelings of the Child. I think maybe you recently in his presence, quarreled with her husband and toddler took your quarrel to heart and going through it again and again. Or he watched a scary movie, and he did not explain that monsters and witches do not exist.

• Our advice what to do: such a child during a tantrum in any case can not be left alone in the room, hoping that he nakrichit, naplachetsya himself to calm down. No need to immediately and ask about the reasons for his behavior.

The most effective hug, cuddle, reassure that the baby felt: next to the mother he can have nothing to fear.

Preventing a child's tantrums, scandals and quarrels

The most common situation tantrums in a child what to do and how to do:

Situation: The kid in a toy store he saw that he liked so that it requires to buy it immediately.

Invalid response: "get along, you have toys and so full, you were never removed and generally behaving badly."

Correct response: Promise to purchase to the nearest holiday. And you expose the condition always for a clean up.

Situation: It's time to go home for lunch, but the kid totally disagree leave the playground

Incorrect response: Drag the arm stubborn stubborn, "Stop! You're a disgrace to me - everybody is looking at us! "

Correct response: Give the child to choose: to go home to dinner in five minutes or ten.

Situation: After catching up, frustrated child declares that goes to live with his grandmother, and that you do not like him.

Incorrect response: Opening the door, shouting: "Come on! I'm so (pejorative word) is not needed! "

Correct response: Arranging a scolding, to speak calmly. And explain that you love him no matter how he behaves.