I'll give the child to kindergarten?

I heard once from a large single mother, to the question: Why did the kindergarten child does not give; here's the answer: I gave birth to them, not in order to educate them Aunt darling of kindergarten. This simple and wonderful at the same time the content of a response, made me ponder, and if we are right, giving children the wrong hands, under the supervision of tutors?

I remembered my oldest son painfully long accustomed and without much joy went to the garden with a 3, 5 years. As we had three garden in search of a better, and I pick up the child in the afternoon, because for more than half the child stood there.

I remembered as the garden took quite average 5 years, because he begged and lamented, had not the strength to resist. And I asked a question about her husband's youngest son: A Maxim to kindergarten will give? My husband once said that up to three years do not even think. And I did not think.

To be honest, I think it is not quite normal mothers who give children when they turn eighteen months, or even earlier in the day nursery. To throw the baby so early in the lurch, must be very good reasons. Something like the return to work to this child did not die of hunger.

Nothing else to justify such an act, I can not. And all the arguments on the subject that the child need to communicate in a group of children, what he needs to get used to the society, regarded me as idle chatter adults who do not love their children.

Because I did not think to give her son a half years. My husband gave me a lot of arguments in favor of the child up to three years should foster mom to prescribe in its pure soul of the most basic moral concepts and values.

Well, after three and you can give, is not terrible, - said my husband. And I still can not calm down. But it is not terrible, after three years to send their children to strangers?

No one will deny that the child comes into this world through the mother. And the world knows that with her help. My mother for the baby - is it the smallest and at the same time a huge world out of which he loses as a person. He has to physically feel her unique warm touch her gentle and tender hand, look into her full of kindness and love of the eye.

Mom - a guide. She is responsible for much lead your child. A child needs to know that he is not alone in this cruel world, aimlessly, around him rudeness and anger. And how is it to find out if ...

Let us remember a very typical case: Mom leads a child in kindergarten, the teacher polite and friendly, patiently talking to the baby. Mentor - the very miracle - the kind eyes, soft voice. Mom is glad and happy, because her baby is in good hands.

A minute after she left the good hands of the educator become stiff, they unceremoniously grabbed the child who climbed on the cabinet and shake it with incredible force.

Good eyes were small and scratchy. From the soft voices in the two accounts has disappeared. Mentor turns purple face and yells furiously, continuing to shake the baby: Where you climb, Orlov? How many times to repeat that this can not be done? Are you dumb?

The child begins to cry and hears in response to all the same prickly cold voice uttered: Nothing to shout, I'm not your mother, to me, these things do not pass. The march to the corner.

Standing in the corner, poking a finger painted walls, trying to find the child in his little head the three-year answer to the question: Why? Why mom gives it to here? What did he do this, that my mother left him, and left him with this wicked aunt that he was not my mother?

The next day, the baby badly wants to go into the garden, what causes resentment mother is late for work. He roars excitedly, he desperately rests his feet, grabs that there are forces beyond the doorway.

And it seems that life ends for him when my mother pulls his hand out of his little hands and, without turning away, slamming the door of the kindergarten.

The kid was crying and calling: Mother, mother, maaa-maaaa !!! But my mother is not.

The one that is designed to preserve and cherish, the one that was created to hug and comfort, the one for him - the whole world, the same mother - NO.

No next guide. And the child as a blind crutch lost, confused and helpless.

And that which is not my mother says:-yyy, nurses dismissed. Roaring finish, you come in a group.

Small fists smearing tears on her cheeks, a child, a little sob, goes to the group.

But he is no longer what it was before.

From his soul had broken off a piece. It will break and beyond.

Each day a piece of ...

As time passes, the child will get used to the fact that his mother leaves him here, even with the time he begins to understand that it's necessary, these are the rules.

He will get used.

  - Be part of the crowd, which we call children's groups.

  - That his feelings no one in the crowd is not considered.

  - That we must listen and obey other people who do not like his men.

  - And the fact that it is one among the crowd.

Why children do not value money

Why children do not value money

The topic of children and money worries many parents. Not individually, but it is in this bunch of kids - money. How to teach their offspring the right to spend the money? How not to corrupt their money and, at the same time as not to make their stingy?

When you want to start a conversation with their children about money? Especially concerned adults question why children do not appreciate the money, treat them "as horrible?" Let's start with the latter.

So why

Three year old birthday gave typewriter for $ 50. What luck! For three days the baby sleeps and eats with the machine, do not let her out of hand for a minute. Her parents shine - pleased, I liked; then worried frown as the rest of the world for three days obstructed their gifts for the baby.

And on the fourth day, horrified, because coming home, seeing parts raskurochennye cars and enthusiastic kid, unscrews the last wheel of the expensive gift. Mother clutches his chest, remembering how they were given to her $ 50, father instinctively grabs the belt, nervously rubbing his hands.

It was only a boy-focused, as if nothing had happened shows the pathetic remains of Chinese parents creators knowingly stating: "Here, here she batteries, there is no petrol in it."

Creek, noise and bustle. The child realizes that there was something terrible, but can not understand that. He played enough machine, checked all its external characteristics and speed, as well as within the emergency, the ability to overcome obstacles by tumbling and vertical take-off, the ability to maneuver at the limit of my grandmother and buoyancy in small and large vessel. Now he is wondering how it all works inside.

The child learns the world around us. And the more complex tasks across him, the fascination with it proceeds to solve them, sometimes with the help of improvised means. He has just discovered the motor, environmentally safe, among other things.

And he does not understand all the fuss with tears and sighs, with reproach in her eyes, because that parents usually behaved when he did something wrong. But now, something he did not do anything wrong, and therefore in his eyes scared and question. And mom and dad talk to him at some incomprehensible language, just some familiar words.

Further more. Narugali for thrown from the balcony of the shoe (adults also already know that from the fifth floor different objects fly in different ways), yelled for the redeems for cleanliness cat (of course, the adults already know that cats should be washed not "Sanit" cleaning bathrooms, and special shampoo), almost slapped slap for cut with scissors bedspread, curtains and a couple some rags (adults, long ago figured out that all the cutting crunches in different ways, by the way, had to tinker with a veil - bad cut).

- What kind of punishment - heavy sighs mother, barely leaving the heart of the opening of the next child.

- Some pest grows - sighs glumly dad again poborovshis desire something a little monster hit.

They do not know that soon their favorite child gets older and starts to paint on the wallpaper, mold clay on the polished furniture, gloves and scarves to lose, tear into a brawl pants and shirts. And then he begins to break or lose the donated clocks, mobile phones, cling to computer viruses from the Internet, ripping and port break and lose ...

At our training activities, we sometimes perform the test: ask people to close their eyes and share what they will call the association sounded then the phrase - "one hundred billion euros! "If there someone from the members of the Association, it is rather strange and a maximum of one and a half million. Why is that?

And because most of us have never thought about the purposes for which we need a sum. That is if you ask people to imagine where they would have invested $ 100, the problem is most likely, will not.

We were given as much money as we can manage. And because we adults often give children as much money as they need for a specific purpose: for ice cream on the lollipop, the ticket to the cinema, to the book.

Give more - and close to the disaster. There are many temptations. For some reason, parents do not give a child fifteen years thousands of dollars on a computer, and he bought it themselves.

Together, let us remember the parable.

Once there was a family: father, mother and son. The son grew up, and his father sent him to look for work, he learned to be a master of and make money for the house. The son took all day, but since nothing else could not, then the work is not found.

His mother regretted his son and gave him a little money, so he took them to his father. Joyful son ran to his father and gave him the money, and my father threw them into a burning hearth. Son looked silently at the ashes and went to sleep.

The next day he again went out of the house, but not even looked for a job and in the evening went to his mother and she gave him back the money that just flew into the furnace from the hands of his father. This continued up until the mother ran out of the money, and then had the poor boy still look for a job.

He found her at the blacksmith. All day, he helped inflate the master of fur in the smithy, rubbed himself blood blisters, and when he came home, would collapse from exhaustion. And their works has earned for a copper coin. The father threw a coin into the fire.

- What are you doing, Dad? - Cried the young man, with his bare hands pulling a penny from coal - I have the whole day of hard work to get it.

And then my father first kinder:

- Now I know that the money you earned honestly - he said the son - they get you hard work, so you start to appreciate them. Now you know the real value of money.

That's the answer to the painful question: why children do not appreciate the money?

They do not know what it is, they do not know how much effort you need to invest in the purchase of new toys, new dress or suit. They nobody will tell, and they take whatever they got for granted.

Children sometimes persists into adulthood opinion that feed, clothe and make gifts for the holidays - it for granted duty of parents. They are surprised that adults do not give them money or do not buy what they are asking themselves. After all, this is, in their view, not so often.